


The Road to Freedom

by Kneepheo



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: M/M, Unfinished Business, all my feels, chapter 72, eruri - Freeform, erwin will live dammit, pleaselive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-13
Updated: 2015-08-13
Packaged: 2018-04-14 12:41:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4565040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kneepheo/pseuds/Kneepheo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>…is hell (and paved with Titans); this Levi knows. </p><p>A continuation of the conversation between Levi and Erwin in Chapter 72. Because I wasn't mentally done with their conversation and wanted more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Road to Freedom

Levi slammed the door. That fucking bastard. He was such a fucking idiot. What the hell was wrong with him? Did he really value seeing some damn basement more than humanity’s victory? Of course he did. He was a fucking idiot!

The slight noise in the hallway from the chatter from the other members of the Survey Corps abruptly ceased as they took in his murderous expression. Hange’s grin slipped off her face as concern pulled her face into a frown- No. He didn’t want to deal with 4-eyes’ emotional badgering at this point. 

Eyes narrowing (burning), he stormed past them all. The building they used as their headquarters was large and lavish. It used to belong to one of those corrupt officials that served the fake king. It was so massive that it comfortably housed a large division of the Survey Corps- all the higher management as well as three squads including Levi’s. 

He stomped up the majestic staircase in the foyer lit with the warm light spilling from the ceilings crystal chandelier. An intrusive thought told him how nice it would feel to smash it to the ground with a resounding (expensive) crash- it was serve that bastard right- but he dismissed it as soon as it came. Rushing around the corner when he reached the top, he made his way through his own room and out the balcony on the side. 

He stayed there, in that blissful quiet, repeatedly running his hand through his hair in frustration, his hands feeling helpless as they clenched and unclenched. In the end, he settled for pinching the bridge of his nose and sighing deeply, going boneless. 

How was it that every time Levi thought they were out of the woods, they seemed to enter another? It was the nature of the job, of course, but recently the close calls had shaken him and his anxiety had shot through the roof. 

And that big fucking doofus had no idea how to take care of himself… 

He opened his eyes and watched the birds fly to and fro and settle into the trees. These were just little ones, Erwin had once told him. Sparrows and crows. On the outside, there were ones as big as a man and ones that could eat a small child for breakfast. He had imagined such birds and couldn’t. Not without remembering Isabel’s love of birds and broken things and wishing for wings himself. 

He thrummed his fingers with agitation when he remembered how HE had to stay back when he had a foot injury, and how the motherfucker tested his nerves by coming back without an arm. He remembered how he didn’t even see hide or hair of the other for days… but was kept awake by news of his torture and impending execution. 

And now… another expedition in which if he was honest with himself, he couldn’t see Erwin making it. Maybe that was unfair of Levi, but the man was injured and had too many close calls already. His luck couldn’t hold out forever, could it? It was sounding superstitious, and Erwin would tell him that probability doesn’t work that way, but he couldn’t help it. It felt like there was a ticking time bomb following Erwin. 

The balcony door swung open gently, and Erwin slid outside, his left side first. Levi was hardly surprised. Erwin never let a conversation go that he didn’t feel good about. If Levi was totally honest with himself, he may have left in a huff on purpose, knowing that Erwin would soon seek him out after thinking through countless possible compromises. Levi prayed.

“Here to give me more shitty noble-sounding excuses?” He scoffed in Erwin’s direction and pretended to look over the edge to see if he could make a getaway to a lower balcony.

“No.” Erwin answered simply. He seemed tentative though, and Levi watched from the corner of his eye what he would do. 

“Levi…” The touch on his shoulder was expected, not unwelcome, and Levi let himself be turned. Levi was used to Erwin’s piercing blue gazes, but this time something felt more raw, close to the surface. He could hardly stand to see the way Erwin was looking at him.

“Thank you for looking after me.” Erwin said softly after a beat. The hand on Levi’s shoulder tightened. “Sometimes I forget that there are such people.” 

Okay, Levi was angrier now than he was before. “How could you fucking forget?”  What was he, chopped liver? Could the idiot not see how HOW MANY grey hairs and lost sleep Levi accumulated even before Erwin came back sans an arm? “You keep fucking throwing yourself in death’s way. If it isn’t a Titan, then it’s the gallows. And if it isn’t the gallows, it’s the fucking Titans again! You just can’t last a day without making me think you’re going to die, can you?” He snarled with venom (hurt).

Alarmingly, impossibly, Levi felt a lump in his throat. It made it hard to continue his tirade without his breath hitching. He forced out his last words, wrenched himself away, and pointedly rested his elbows on the balcony rail. He controlled his breathing, there was no fucking way that Erwin was going to see him choked up over this. 

Erwin’s one arm followed after him and Levi felt it gently cover one of his own hands. He closed his eyes, gritted his teeth, pretended to be annoyed… But he was frantically committing this to memory. The feeling of a solid, live Erwin. Warm. Steady. 

“Forgive me.” Erwin whispered. Ever so softly. And then the warmth was gone. And the man was reaching for the balcony door. And Levi wouldn’t let him go that easily. 

“Is that all you’re going to say?” Levi spit, uncontrollable vitriol in his voice. Forgive him?! For what exactly? There were far too many things Erwin Smith should be sorry for when it came to Levi. What bothered Levi though was the lack of a well-worded compromise. Here, he could even help him out: “I’ll let Hange lead the vanguard, Levi, but I’ll be in the middle,” or “I’ll lead the vanguard, but I’ll put you right beside me.” Or if it wasn’t a compromise, Levi would have expected some cajoling words: smooth, logical, with the right amount of passion that would convince Levi that this was the best way; the only way. This pained apology that Levi got instead… he didn’t want it. 

“What do you want me to say, Levi?” There was frustration in Erwin’s voice. “There’s nothing I _can_ say. Look at me; I’m old and I’m crippled. I can make no promises in such a state. Not ones that I mean.” 

“I don’t fucking know.” Levi snapped tiredly. But he does. There was a short silence. 

“If there weren’t any Titans…” Erwin began. The back of his fingers just barely brushed Levi’s cheek. “My priorities would be clear.” He pinned Levi with a gaze that was a hint of longing and a hint of something else Levi couldn’t quite put in words. A strange sort of seeking for familiar connection that Levi refused to acknowledge. 

“But as it is, I must find out the truth of this world. This is something I owe my father. A debt I must repay before I am free.” 

And then he was really gone, striding through the balcony and out of sight. Levi stood frozen for a minute, mind racing. He touched his cheek. Was he memorizing the feel of him? In the same spirit that Levi had memorized Erwin? 

He watched with envy as a small flock of sparrows twittered before taking off together towards the horizon. He had once felt so stifled. Brought low by crime, desperation, and anger. Physically trapped in the bowels of the underground. Heart caged by the deaths of the ones he held most dear. 

But Erwin had freed him- with a hand outstretched and glint of a promise in his eyes on a battlefield of blood. Levi believed… that the promise of mountains and oceans and the wind under his arms and all the stars in the sky and companionable warmth in the night would be a reality.

Levi swore. It was his turn to free Erwin fucking Smith. Damn humanity’s freedom to hell, it was Erwin’s he wanted. 


End file.
